A Not-So-Quick Update

I know this blog is probably not very interesting to most of you, but I think it's really important for me to write about all the different things I'm experiencing throughout this process, since it's so easy to forget what's been happening from one week to the next. Even just reading back over the last few posts, it's interesting to be able to recognize progress.

This week I've realized that this stuff has really affected my ability to carry on conversations...yes, I know...I'm really good at talking. If we're talking on the phone you may think I'm off my rocker in saying that, since I can still talk. :) It's not so much the talking, but the content that's a problem right now. I've always been a great conversationalist, but it's a lot harder for me right now to talk about things much beyond the days events or what might be happening tomorrow. It's hard for me to put together my thoughts and really articulate what I'm thinking. Most of you have probably noticed at one point or another that I also have difficulty finishing sentences. These are all symptoms of Lyme, and the doctor told me that the treatments would affect "higher brain function" even more for awhile, but I was hoping that I wouldn't necessarily have to deal with that.

I have also noticed that I have a hard time with word retrieval, and I get confused with what day it is, or if I had a conversation with someone earlier this morning, or last Wednesday. It's all a little disconcerting, but easier to handle since I know why it's happening, and that it's temporary. All of this is happening because the infection is in my brain, (which is why I've had balance issues for the last couple years) and as the antibiotics and my immune system kill the bugs, the whole process causes inflammation. The inflammation causes some messages to misfire, so once in awhile, information is not available when you need it.

When I was in Seattle this last time, I tried to use my ATM card, (it's for a checking account I've had for over 10 years, and I've never had a problem remembering my PIN) and for the life of me, I could not remember my PIN. I tried four different times to put it in, and couldn't get it right. The information was just not there. There was a long line of people behind me, and I was embarrassed by that and flustered about the whole situation. Luckily, I always bring an emergency credit card with me when I travel, so I just used that. That incident was really upsetting to me, but those kinds of moments are getting easier to deal with because I just tell myself that it's necessary to getting better.

In happier news, I think the Mepron and the Cortef are really helping me. I started on my second bottle of Mepron yesterday, and I have noticed substantial improvement in my energy over the last week. I have still been tired, and I still need to rest frequently, but I've been able to get so much more done compared to the last several months. So, I've taken the Mepron for about 22 or 23 days now. The doctor thought that the 2 strains of Babesia (a co-infection to Lyme that's similar to Malaria) that I have are probably contributing to the extreme fatigue that I've had, and that treating that infection and getting it out of the way would help. I think she was right, and I'm really excited about the improvement.

The rest of my antibiotics and supplements are going well, and I seem to be on the right track. I feel really blessed, because compared with others I have heard from and read about that are in my same situation, I think I'm tolerating everything really well, and that I'm actually pretty healthy given the circumstances. I had a fairly busy afternoon and evening yesterday, and I was expecting that I would probably be in bed all day today recovering. I woke up this morning feeling really good, so I'm going to try to get a few things done around the house. I have to take it easy though, so I have enough energy to get to church tomorrow. Sometimes when I feel good I have a tendency to overdo it.

A friend of mine came to visit last week and told me about another friend she has that was diagnosed with Lyme disease awhile ago. She describes it as knowing that you have a jar with a set number of marbles in it each day. The marbles represent your energy. If you want to use the marbles doing dishes and vacuuming the house, that's fine. If you want to save them so you can BBQ with friends, that's fine, too, but you probably aren't going to have enough to do both. The point is, everyday, you have to decide what you want to use your marbles for, since there is a limited supply. I thought that was a really great analogy. I am learning to pace myself for now, and eventually, when I get feeling better, I will have so much more appreciation for the gift of health and strength. You hear that phrase a lot, and it seems kind of trite most of the time when we use it. It has entirely new meaning to me because of all of this!

Oh, one more thing. I was watching Mystery Diagnosis this week on TLC. There was a guy on there that was having all these bizarre symptoms, and I was like...it sounds like he has Lyme. Well, I kept watching, and he totally did have it! It was pretty interesting. At the end they had a physician on talking about it a little bit, then they did a follow up with him. After antibiotic therapy for a year and a half, he was back to normal. Three years after his ordeal started, he said he was back to 100%. It was really encouraging to see that! I got my treadmill set up this week, and my goal for this next week is to walk everyday -- even if it's only 3 to 5 minutes. I think it will make me feel better knowing that I'm doing something. All-in-all, this has been a great week for me, and I'm very optimistic about the future.

NEXT!!

So much has been happening in my life lately as a direct result of having Lyme. So many people have told me that they think I'm being incredibly optimistic. I guess I just see it as my only choice. Of course I would rather not be dealing with all of this, but the reality is that I AM. I want to be able to get through this in the best way possible, and seeing the good things in my life throughout the process. I'm trying to be open to all the changes and embrace what's going on, so that I can move forward to the NEXT phase of my life once things have calmed down and returned to normal (or something like it.)

I went back to Seattle two weeks ago, and I've gotten new prescriptions. Right now, I'm taking the same antibiotics, (Doxycyclene, Plaquenil & Biaxin) but we added in Cortex (which stimulates the adrenals -- hopefully giving me a temporary boost of energy) and a lovely anti-malarial suspension called Mepron. It's as thick as tempra paint, and bright yellow. Very interesting...my doctor thinks that by adding in the Mepron right now, we can address the two different strains of Babesia, which is probably adding to my extreme fatigue. I'm on pediatric doses of all of the above, because my doctor says I'm "so small," which I interpret to mean SHORT...hahaha. Also, we don't want to overdo the meds and make me sicker than what I have to be!

I had an incredible burst of energy two days ago, where I was up first thing in the morning, created a budget, (my new retirement budget, heehee) cleaned my kitchen, rearranged some things in my living room, packed some boxes and made a pot roast. This was amazing, because most of the time it's all I can do to get up and do one or two quick things around the house in the entire day. I've learned, though, that when I'm feeling good, I need to take advantage of it! I've also learned not to overdo it, because sometimes I pay for all that extra energy over the next two days as my body protests over the exertion my muscles aren't used to.

Speaking of muscles, I'm in the middle of reorganizing my house, (with the help of some wonderful friends) and I'm changing my dining room into my personal gym. I'm hoping to be able to start using my treadmill again, maybe only 3 to 5 minutes a day at first, but something will be better than nothing. I'm also going to try to do some really light weight training, which hopefully will help a little bit with my muscle weakness over time. One of the most frustrating things in all of this, is that I just haven't been able to get things done the way I used to. I'm learning to rely on others for help, and I'm also learning how to let go and let things get done when they get done. It's hard though, because things seem so crazy right now! Patience, patience, patience...

Overall, I'm feeling optimistic about everything, and I've been thinking about specific goals that I want to set over the next three months so that I have something to look forward to as I start feeling better. I want to go visit my friend in South Carolina, and I'm thinking about a couple classes I would love to take if I can figure out how to do it...I would love to take the Wilton Professional Cakes class at their school in Chicago...I know it sounds crazy, but I love doing cakes. The class is only 9 days, so if I really do get feeling better (and my hands get better) in the next couple of months, I might do that before I go back to work.

Before I started SkinScience, I had wanted to get much more involved in the medical side of our industry, and I think in a few months, (when I am feeling better) it might be fun to start back into things by maybe working part time at a medical spa or with a physician. I have worked with a plastic surgeon in the past, and it might be fun to get back into that at some point. We'll see. I'm going to stay focused on future options and possibilities, and take advantage of the next six months as a time to figure all of that out. I feel blessed and grateful for where I am in my life, and that Heavenly Father is taking care of me, and has made allowances for everything that's going on right now.